A “performative male” refers to men who deliberately engage in feminine, woke, or feminist-coded behaviors in the hope that women will find them more likeable and attractive. It’s about men putting on a performance because they expect something in return. (It’s reminiscent of the “Pick-me-Girl” or the “Nice Guy.”)
“Performative male” is a social media trend that became popular in 2025.
Another expression for “performative male” is “matcha male” or “matcha man.”
“Performative Male”: Accessories, Meaning, Definition, Explanation
According to social media, a “performative male” can be recognized by the following traits and behaviors:
- He appears feminist and woke.
- He reads books by bell hooks (All About Love) or Sally Rooney.
- He paints his fingernails.
- He wears a pearl necklace.
- He listens to artists like Clairo, Laufey, and Beabadoobee.
- He drinks matcha lattes.
- He likes Labubu.
- He watches reality TV.
- He is interested in astrology.
Performative males do these things simply because women do them and they hope that by mimicking such behaviors, women will find them more likeable.
Editorial Opinion: Performative Male
The “performative male” is a variation of the Nice Guy. Nice Guys are men who are only kind to women because they secretly expect intimacy in return. Their mindset is: “I do something for you, so you owe me something back.” But this logic doesn’t work. Being nice does not mean others are obligated to reciprocate.
The “performative male” is no different. He performs a role because he wants to be liked, and ultimately, because he hopes for intimacy.
The underlying problem remains the same: performative males behave in a certain way to gain attention and validation, BUT this does not reflect their true personality or character. This is why they are often accused of dishonesty and hidden agendas.
In other words: performative males deliberately present themselves as feminist and woke, but it’s all just a façade. They want to be liked, not because they genuinely believe in those values, but because they think it will give them easier access to women.
Criticism of the “Performative Male”
There are two main criticisms of the performative male:
He undermines the seriousness of important issues like feminism, equality, and diversity. If men adopt these topics only for show, their expressed convictions become meaningless. They are reduced to a marketing tool used to ease their loneliness and pursue intimacy.
Their performance is easy to see through. performative males stand for nothing. They may voice convictions, but they will neither defend nor truly uphold them.
This sets them apart from men who are genuinely feminist. Real convictions come from inner values, not calculation. A performative approach, on the other hand, feels fake and contrived. As a result, these men often achieve the exact opposite of what they want: they come across as inauthentic, staged and false. (Which is exactly why this became a social media trend.)
At the same time, the performative male also reflects the insecurities of modern masculinity. He is the counter-image to the “Alpha Male.” In this sense, the performative male can be seen as an over-adaptation for disoriented men imitating feminine, woke, or feminist-coded behaviors to find their place in society.
Conclusion: Performative Male
The performative male is a symptom of broader social change. He represents the failed attempt to find a place between outdated gender roles and new expectations. Unfortunately, the chosen strategy is completely wrong: instead of authenticity, it relies on performance.
The performative male remains an inauthentic figure. He wants to be liked as a person, yet all he offers is a role, a façade or a performance. That has never been enough and it has never been a long-term solution. Because façades, sooner or later, always collapse.